Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
Glenn C. Peck (KE5GK)
on
April 15, 2003
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Ten More Undeniable Ham Truths
(In my humble opinion)
1. A clean ham shack is an oxymoron.
2. The rare DX will be on while you're on vacation.
3. The higher the tower, the greater the TVI complaints.
4. Your grandchildren are more likely to become hams than your children.
5. Hamfest attendance is inversely related to the price of gasoline.
6. Lightning will always hit the expensive gear first.
7. Whistling "CQ" in the dark deters muggers.
8. The older the ham club president, the fewer young members.
9. Computer Nerds think that Hams are the real weirdos.
10. Junk boxes will never, never contain the last part needed to complete a project.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by K8LEA on April 9, 2003
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Can't think of the exact percentage, but don't forget that:
"A homebrew project costs about 1.5 times as much as buying it."
We may also add:
"If you can get it, it's obsolete."
"If my wife ever finds out what this stuff cost, I'm a dead man...."
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by KG4RUL on April 15, 2003
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Among Hams, Code vs No Code is like British Humor - You either like it or you don't.
Dennis
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by W3FHW on April 15, 2003
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The worthless stuff thrown away today shows up on Ebay tomorrow.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by K1RDD on April 15, 2003
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If you can't understand the kid at the drive through speaker at McDonalds, saying "QRZ?" or "Again, again?" only complicates matters.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by K4SFC on April 15, 2003
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Putting up a new antenna, guarantees all other hams are off the air that day!
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by KE4MOB on April 15, 2003
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The price of a new piece of equipment is always at least twice of what you have on hand.
The time required to perform a repair is inversely proportional to the level of difficulty.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by AD7DB on April 15, 2003
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Definitions:
Junk: Stuff we throw away.
Stuff: Junk we keep.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by W4ROT on April 15, 2003
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If n screws secure a component and n > 5, then n-2 screws will be available on reassembly.
Terry
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by KT8K on April 15, 2003
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"The worthless stuff thrown away today shows up on Ebay tomorrow." and then a week later you need it again, but it's either been sold or the price is ridiculously high.
Murphy corrolary 3B - Anything you want to do, you have to do something else first. (Applies doubly to hams)
Propogation from your location is always one-way: in.
It _ALWAYS_ rains on Field Day weekend.
Thanks to DX spotting, the rare country you REALLY need will draw a HUGE pileup within seconds of appearing on the air, and propagation will change before it dies down enough for you to get through.
The huge VHF or UHF antenna you worked so hard to put up will move just far enough in the wind to make that rare station completely disappear before you can get your callsign across.
When you're building something or putting up an antenna, you just can't find your wire stretcher or hole shrinker when you need them.
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by K8AG on April 15, 2003
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You never really have all of the desired accessories for a piece of equipment.
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WA9SVD on April 15, 2003
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The "Law of Selective Gravitation" states that a dropped tool will land where it can do the greatest damage. A corollary states that a dropped screw will land where it can never be found.
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by N8IK on April 15, 2003
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If you can't sneak it in through the basement window, bring it in through the front door wrapped in a fur coat.
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by WB2WIK on April 15, 2003
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Regarding antennas:
"If it stayed up through the storm, it wasn't big enough."
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by AD7DB on April 15, 2003
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In a QSO, if you had half as much fun contacting the other guy, he had twice as much fun contacting you!
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by AD7DB on April 15, 2003
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No matter how short you cut the antenna, the center frequency is still too high.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by AD7DB on April 15, 2003
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Your teenaged son refers to you as his "old man" and you don't even realize it's an insult.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by AD7DB on April 15, 2003
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You have absolutely no trouble finding your car in a crowded parking lot. (Unless you're at a hamfest.)
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by AD7DB on April 15, 2003
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You never call your friends by their real name, but instead by their cars license plate!
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by W9WHE on April 15, 2003
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Whatever day you choose to attend Dayton, that will be the day the whether turns bad.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by N3QT on April 15, 2003
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SAVE FOR YEARS.
...BUY THE RADIO OF DREAMS.
......NEW MODEL REVISION COMES OUT 2 MONTHS LATER.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by K8AG on April 15, 2003
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Immediately after finally busting a through a DX pileup with only 100 watts and getting a 5X5, the neighbor's QRP station breaks in running 300mw and gets a 5X8.
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by NG1J on April 15, 2003
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As soon as you confirm the last one for Honor Roll, a new entity is added.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by K8AG on April 15, 2003
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The homebrew qrp micro transceiver you built for portable operation, when setup for field day with all of the auxiliary equipment, takes 2X the power and 3X the desk space of your home station.
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by K8AG on April 15, 2003
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You can always relate everything to an experience with ham radio.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by NJ7X on April 15, 2003
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1) It's a fact that as soon as you start putting an antenna up the wind will start, and the higher the installation the faster the wind will blow. Almost as if Mother Nature believes it's a FCC requirement.
2) There is no such thint as a "wireless" station.
3) After listening to a DX station you need, a couple of things will happen. First you forgot to turn the gain up, or your set for splits when he's simplex or visa versa, or you get a lousy signal report and later find you are antenna swith is turned to a dummy load or ground position.
4) Brag about how well an antenna or piece of gear works for you, and after another HAM builds or buy's one just like it. The other station get's lousy or no results, or it makes the problem worse.
5) Ask a group of hams about a problem your having and you will get a lot of "varied" solutions of which one might work!
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by WA2JJH on April 15, 2003
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how refreshing...some good humor!
Just saw this one, I will have some in few days.
If we are hams, does that mean SWL'ers are roastbeefs?
1)Many have said this before. We all have had atleast three ultra painful solder experiences! Mine was when a solder blob feel on the top of my foot. The waiting the 20 seconds for the solder to cool seems like hours!
Too add triple insult to injury we had to yank off the cooled off solder blob!
2)We have been zapped with high voltage that should have killed us.
3) we have all wired up a mic connector or PL-259, forgeting the parts that had to be put in before the solder job.
4)As soon as the newest ultra rig comes out, we all think what we could sell off to buy it.
5)We all get annoyed when a radio shlock sales man says..."Can I help you!"
6)We buy things at hamfests at a creakhead price , and we expect it to work.
7)When we were kids, we were called dorks,geeks,and freaks.(I think someone said that one first)
8)When we were kids, the Radio shack catalog arrival was a party, or happening!
perfect.
9)When we were young little hamlets, we got lip from an old timer!
10)We get all nostalgic for our first rig, even though our first rig was a piece of crap.
11)We all like good positive funny threads, that do not turn into Jerry Springer!
73 peace de MIKE
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by K5UJ on April 15, 2003
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If anything quits on you it will be something you enjoy/need and have only one of.
So you get a backup.
Something else quits.
You get backups for everything.
New whiz-bang gadget comes out that makes everything you bought unnecessary.
Love this hobby.
Rob
K5UJ
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by KA4KOE on April 15, 2003
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When you aren't looking, you will ALWAYS pick up that pencil soldering iron by the wrong end. Been there, done that.
When you are testing your rig for problems on-air (always a bad idea), you will be heard right on top of WWV at 10 MHz. (I called the guy and told him he had a REAL big problem).
The guy will all the fancy DF equipment and no experience will never be first to find the bunny.
You haven't been shocked good unless you scream out some 4 letter obscenity and your girlfriend/wife/concubine/escort comes running. Also, your hands must tremble for at least a day.
Philip
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by K8AG on April 15, 2003
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Showing a colleague your ham radio station, you brag about the DX you worked in Brazil. You are then interrupted as his cell phone rings and it is a call from a business contact in Austrailia. After the conversation he asks, "So why do you need all of this equipment?"
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by K8AG on April 15, 2003
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You leave work unproductive and exhausted from subconsciously trying to copy the faint DX CW coming from the copy machine, air conditioner etc. with the squeeky bearings.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WA2JJH on April 15, 2003
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Every movie you see, if there is a scene with some one using CW, you check to see if the subtitle is correct
with the CW. I find it is 50/50.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by W8OB on April 15, 2003
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Fact: A antenna installed when the outside temp is -20F will work better than the same one installed at 70F
Fact: One of your antennas or piece of gear that you seldom ever if at all use develops a problem, now all of a sudden you must get it fixed as if you use it daily.
Fact: No matter how easy a project went for a fellow ham the minute you start it, it turns into a murphys free for all.
Fact: The last 3 months the average wind speeds have been zero to 5 mph, The minute you finish installing that 90 foot tower with the stacked christmas trees on it high wind warnings are issued and persist for weeks afterward.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WA2JJH on April 15, 2003
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Ohms law should be taken to the supreme court. At absolute zero, Ohms law can be repealed!
On a more seriose note MURPHYS LAW must be repealed!
Murphays law is biased against hams!
Too many hams have lost time, money, and pay huge hospital and DR bills.
All of this suffering is from MURPHYS LAW. Nobody knows when this law was passed.
Anybody that voted for MURPHYS LAW should be hung after a fair trial.
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by K4CDK on April 15, 2003
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Isn't it wonderful how much the truth hurts --- just about all areas covered fit at one time or another.
73s -- Don
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by KA4KOE on April 15, 2003
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I remember one episode of MASH where the cast was doing a bris on a male hebrew child. The rabbi was on a carrier and sending morse code instructions to the team at the field hospital......
Get this...the Rabbi's directions for the bris were, in fact, a weather report!!!!
Now, if you remember Fantastic Voyage, the radio op sending on a chrome vibroplex, and the morse if PERFECT!!!!
Philip
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by KA4KOE on April 15, 2003
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Another one.....for us married types.
How is it that the XYL can justify shoes, makeup, perms, etc., (upkeep) over the year, but just you try and get a ham related item without any flack. If you add it all up you are in fact spending LESS!!!!!!!
Am I alone in this?
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by RADIO123US on April 15, 2003
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Your XYL/Girlfriend thinks the word "stupid" always
belongs before the word "radio" in a sentence.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by RADIO123US on April 15, 2003
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Here's another one..your teenager can't
understand why you would want to talk to
a total stranger on the radio...while telling
you how cool it is to meet new "friends" on AOL...
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by NE0P on April 15, 2003
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And the friends you meet on the radio will probably never try to lure you into unmentionable, illegal, immoral acts-unless it is on 75 meters
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by RADIO123US on April 15, 2003
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and another undeniable truth....no matter where
the DX station is, your beam will always be pointed
in the opposite direction....
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by W1RG on April 15, 2003
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O'Tooles corollary to Murpy's Law...
Murphy was an optomist!
W1RG
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WA2JJH on April 15, 2003
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The average ham will have 3 transceivers, and 3 pairs of shoes. Hams with transceivers have saved many lives.
The XYL/YL has 1 walkman radio, and 20 pairs of shoes. People have been killed listening to walkmen, while walking into traffic.
Can a pair of shoes save a life!
I guess in an emergency, shoes can be boiled into a stew, and feed starving people.
Try that one on your XYL/YL!
Then again maybe you should not. You might get shoe stew for dinner!
Gee honey, the meat is very tough tonight. In fact its as tough as shoe leather!
73 and laugh's MIKE
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by KZ9G on April 15, 2003
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My objective:
Convincing my wife to get her ham license (WL7QJ).
Result:
Her newfound ham radio understanding is used to convince me to severely curtail my ham activities.
Have pity on me...
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WA2JJH on April 16, 2003
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A fringe benefit of ham radio is....No consumer electronics store can tell you JACK SH--!!
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by K1OU on April 16, 2003
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Morning gallbladder nets on your favorite local repeater. As if there is such a thing as a favorite local repeater.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by NE0P on April 16, 2003
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When a DX station starts working by the numbers, he will go QRT or you will lose propagation before he gets to ZEROS.
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by KZ9G on April 16, 2003
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Hey NE0P!
John! That's a good one. I do remember living in Iowa and the "10th" call area. DX'ing from the "Black Hole" of the Midwest is almost as bad as DX'ing from Alaska. I know this after operating HF in Eagle River and Chugiak, Alaska as KL7DC for seven years. There are way too many geo-magnetic disturbances and solar events that cause degraded HF conditions or blackouts. Just the slightest ones cause problems above the 60th parallel. Luckily, the "KL7" call perks a few ears, adding a few db back into the mix, as compared to those at lower latitudes (lower forty-eight stations). IMHO, Alaska stations are still 6 to 10 dB down, even with their callsign! Living and working there was fun and challenging. I wish I could go back!
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by WV4I on April 16, 2003
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I find it incredible that no one added:
"Antennas put up at night, preferably in bad weather, always perform better. And that, antenna erection during thunderstorms is a plus also".
CAUTION: Do not try this at home!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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by RADIO123US on April 16, 2003
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Here's another one... The XYL will ALWAYS need help
with something DURING a QSO, never before or after
the QSO.
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by N3FQL on April 16, 2003
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Your newly ordered rig will not be delivered on the day you take off work!
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by N5XM on April 16, 2003
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During tornado watches and warnings, we are more concerned about our antennas coming down than we are about our house being blown up.
Yes indeed, I've wondered if all the XYL's shoes, many sets of clothes, nail appointments, trips to hair stylists, tanning bed trips, etc. etc. etc. do indeed add up to more than my gear. The scary thing is I have a lot of gear!
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by WA2JJH on April 16, 2003
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How many times has this one happpened to you?
You have dual band H-T, you do not use it much.
A day comes by when you want to use it...The batteries are dead. You miss out on a special event.
The plug on your trickle charger was pulled out of the AC socket by the cat, XYL, or what ever a few days before.
I only buy radio's now that have an AA cell adapter.
In fact I HATE RECHARGABLE BATTERIES, THEY ARE NEVER CHARGED WHEN YOU NEED THEM TO BE!!
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by RADIO123US on April 16, 2003
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When buying a new car, your MAIN consideration
is if radios and antennas can be easily installed. You will pay extra $$$ for a car/truck that is "radio friendly".
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by ND4MR on April 16, 2003
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When teaching a new ham class, I always stress the importance of a good antenna by giving what I have (all humility aside) dubbed the First Immutable Law of Radio:
-- An expensive, modern high-tech radio that is connected to a crappy antenna will yield crappy results, but a moderately-priced, ordinary radio that is connected to an excellent antenna will yield surprisingly good results.
First Corollary: the operator of the aforementioned expensive radio connected to the crappy antenna will, nonetheless, swear that his poor signal is due to your cheap and/or defective equipment.
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by JJ1BDX on April 16, 2003
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Most JA DXers believe they have excellent English communication skills in general, in spite of the fact that they only understand phonetics and five-nines.
Very few JA hams pay for anti-virus software, and the virus attack comes when they work with DXs in PSK31 (or RTTY or whatever applicable).
Your computer logger fails most likely while you're doing the best in a contest.
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by RADIO123US on April 16, 2003
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The likelyhood of finding a flaw in your PSK31/Digital
software is directly related to the rarity of the DX
station you are working at the time.
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by WA2JJH on April 16, 2003
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This is based on a true story. If you see a vintage Collins rig on Ebay that you always wanted. The seller
will claim the radio works.The photo will be perfect..
The seller will improperly pack the rig. The rig arrived looking like it was dropped from the Washington monument.
UPS is horrible with insurence claims. Even if the rig was double boxed, UPS will find something wrong with the packing. UPS will null and void insurence after so called investigating for 2 months.
The Ham is stuck. However if paid by credit card
claim fruad! The credit card company will not pay the low life seller.
UPS insurence is worthless!
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by K8DXX on April 16, 2003
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If your antenna didn't come down during the winter, it wasn't BIG enough!
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by W4TME on April 16, 2003
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Great thread.
As a hamlet (technician) you are always being corrected by the resident Extra class operator on how to do things "right".
When you have aspired to become that Extra class operator, you are the one who forgot to solder the ladderline to the dipole for Field Day.
73 de W4TME
-Tim
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by WA2JJH on April 16, 2003
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I agree with the TECH. about getting lip from EXTRAS. I have been an EXTRA since I was 18 years old. I would get lip from Generals that were GENERALS for 25 years. Pay OCD-AR types no mind. Back then people used call books to find out who was who. No computer lookups.
So Those Generals thought I was a TECH.
I have been an EXTRA for 25 years, I got lip from an EXTRA that was an EXTRA for 40 years. You will always have your know it alls! I say F them all!
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by WD4AOG on April 16, 2003
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TRUTH: After net control says,"spread 'em out and give your call suffix one time only", no one will transmit until you do.
TRUTH: The part or accessory you need for that newly-acquired second-hand rig is no longer in production.
TRUTH: Any part or accessory you scrimped and saved to buy will thereafter be offered free with purchase of the rig.
TRUTH: No matter how long you search for the best price, someone will offer a better price the week after you buy.
TRUTH: No matter when you get your ticket, 20 years later you will decide that ham radio has gone to Hell in a handbasket.
TRUTH: I still can't think of a better hobby.
73
Michael
WD4AOG
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by KN8AW on April 16, 2003
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The easier it is to disassemble a piece of equipment, the more difficult it will be to reassemble same.
The piece of equipment that you have used once will not work when you absolutely must have it for a contest, special event, etc.
No matter when a new piece of equipment arrives at the QTH, it will be exactly two weeks before you are able to use it.
The higher up on the tower you are, the more likely it will be that you drop a tool that you need. Of course, since you are alone, you must climb back down to retrieve the tool. The tool will be visible until you are down on the ground, thus assuring you that it will never be found until you hit it with the lawn mower. On the way to the ground, the tool will first strike your knee, prolonging the time it will take before you can climb down and not find it.
For every inch that you pull the coax to reach a connector, everything attached to the other end will be pulled one foot.
The tool you need for a project cannot be found until you go out a purchase another just like it.
The piece of junk equipment you want to get rid of when it finally quits working, will oulast you.
If you know what cable is attached to what piece of equipment at the other end, you do not have enough.
Your keyer functions perfectly until the moment of the contest, forcing you to use a straight key. Exactly 48 hours later, the keyer again functions flawlessly.
The number of batteries you have will be exactly one less than the number you need.
The more desparate you are for a part, the more likely it will be that you cannot get it at any price.
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by AD5GX on April 16, 2003
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"Christmas" and or "birthday" comes about 15 times per year (or whenever an unbudgeted radio purchase comes up). Technically I shouldn't be getting any more "presents" for the next 10 years!
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by KC0MBM on April 16, 2003
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I know of only one ham that has a superclean hamshack. He has not been on the air for years.
Ham axiom: get on the air, the desk gets cluttered.
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Hamfest truths?
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by K4III on April 16, 2003
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Every item, piece of equipment, or part such as a resistor you ever had was used at some time for a project! Every piece of equipment you saw at a hamfest and passed by was always the "missing ingredient" for the project and future hamfest searches were usually fruitless in obtaining this object! Every hamfest yields new projects that will become partially finished come the next hamfest.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by KC5CQW on April 16, 2003
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Why do a bunch of Hams address themselves in the plural? Who the hell is "we"? I guess I was right, they do have multiple personallity disorder...
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WA2JJH on April 17, 2003
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Here is a truth and a question. I would not mind an answer to the question.
Of all the spectrum hams have, it seems that the most horrible things are said about 75Meters!
I see thread after thread something negative about hams that operate 75 meters. All sorts of personal things. Lack of bathing, poor eating habits, alledged
bizaar sexual behavior,using bad radio's, clickish nets,nasty attitudes,bad driving,littering,BBQ roadkill, using farm animal dung for antennas, and
things I will not even repeat.
These are not my ideas at all. This is just a sampling of what hams say about hams that operate 75meters. I have seen these comments in EHAM, and
what I hear on the other bands.
Is it just because 75meters is a popular for AM
Plate modulation? You will find bad drivers and proffesional litterers on all bands. Even 535nM, my favorite band. I am a horrible driver, and I have been known to litter. I am not a proffesional litterer. I try not to.
My littering is confined to flicking cigarette butts on gang banger cars. Yes, sometimes there were gangbangers in the cars.(they were speeding, and were too busy not running over pedestrians to notice).
Please, what gives? I know people that operate 75M.
They are decent people. Using PLATE AM is not a sin.
A truth, More bad things are said about 75M than any other band. Some make 75M seem like 11M. IN NYC 11M is insane.
I tip my hat to those who migrated from CB to HAM. I do not bash 11 meters in general. It is a life line for truckers. Much good public service is done on 11M.
Many of my MOS friends have a CB next to the Motorola. They have found it very usefull.
I have just seen so many comments, that make 75M the Jerry Springer of Ham bands. I do have to say, I am never on 75M. Do not have the space for a dipole. My
vertical, like most verticals are useless.
So what gives with 75M?
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by K1OU on April 17, 2003
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My take about 75 meters is that it's like being in a city. You get an interesting mix of people. In one end of the city you have the bluebloods who are into the latest and greatest, have the toys, etc. In another part you have the average Joe Kilowatt who likes to just hang out and have fun, and on another end of town you have the late-night beer drinking hellraisers next door to the easygoing working stiff. When the party gets too loud, somebody might get offended. In yet another part of town, you have the crowds who are into a particular scene who don't live in the mainstream. When these interests and outlooks collide, there can be friction due to different sensibilities. And when 75 meters causes anxiety, go back to the real world and get a perspective. It worked for me.
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by KA4KOE on April 17, 2003
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I will miss the high power "Gator Stakes" contests that occurred on 3898 in the late 80s. Although I didn't participate, they were fun to listen to. The guys would have heats, and whoever was heard would wing a heat.
I'm talking mass controlled pandomonium during those one minute long heats. My friend with 600 watts was heard somewhere in heat 6 or 7.
The FCC busted some of the more enthusiastic participants for running power in excess of 20,000 watts with commercial amplifiers. No kidding.
So, I would say that 75m is less interesting to listen to today.
Philip
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by W2VD on April 17, 2003
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"The more radios I have, the more radios I need."
"The shack is NEVER big enough for all of the stuff."
Regarding another poster mentioning something about getting upset when a Radio Shack employee asks if we "need help" (along with trying to sell us a cellphone and/or a satellite dish), I always answer:
"Yes, do you have the winning lottery numbers for the next drawing?"
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by K8AG on April 17, 2003
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When you don't have a spare rig, the rig you are using will either quit, or have an annoying problem that it never had before. Once the spare rig is back, the problem goes away.
The next piece of equipment that you will buy because it is such a bargain, not because you actually need it or know how to use it. Of course, as said before, after purchase you see it for less in about 5 places.
Air Traffic Control warns inbound aircraft away from your car when you go to the airport to pick up a friend.
There are no more light fixtures in the parking structure that you use at work.
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by NE0P on April 17, 2003
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UPS will bring the new rig the day after the contest. Had this happen to me in 1998. Was already for the UHF contest with a FT736 with 6, 2, 222, and 432 on the way. Put up the new 222 beam, and moved the 432 antenna up higher. The FT736 arrived the monday after the contest.
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by N8FVJ on April 17, 2003
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You start a new communications project, then when finished wonder why you ever did it in the first place. After all, your 'other' station works much better anyways- and you knew this before you started it.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WA2JJH on April 17, 2003
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You start out designing something. A project that is nifty, and unique. A project that might get published.
You start getting the parts. Some from Radio shack.
Some of the parts take too long to get. The law of entropy sets in. You loose interest and some of the parts.
A few months later, Somebody else with the same idea, is selling it!
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by K1CJS on April 17, 2003
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The co-ax you carefully selected and measured for an installation is six inches too short when you're ready to finish the job.
You've just "permanently" installed your antenna.
Almost half the cost of your 'wireless' station is the wire (co-ax) you had to get for it.
Just when you finally thought you had a rig for every place you wanted one, you find one more place you would like to have a rig--and no rig to be put there!
AND-----Every time you go onto a ham themed website you see an article you just have to leave a comment to!!!
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WB5PLJ on April 18, 2003
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1) After hundreds of foot of wire and all of your efforts to make DX contacts, your friend (who you introduced to ham radio) gets twice the number of contacts in one day using two meatle folding Chairs!
2) Eventually you will find your self signing off after talking to an awnsering machine.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by K4IQT on April 18, 2003
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Truth: The XYL will never understand why you insist on keeping all those boxes of cables, aluminum scraps, circuit boards, mildewed tube caddies, and rusty old radio chasses. This is especially true when you suggest that the garage would be roomier if we would get rid of the stacks of retired board games, the boxes of worn-out / outgrown children's clothing, and the shelves full of perennially empty vases and flower pots.
Truth: ANY used gear you buy via the Internet will have serious problems costing serious time or bucks to resolve. It matters not who you buy it from, what they may say about it, or how it looks in the ad-accompanying pictures. And to think that our local clubs dropped their hamfests because of competition from eBay!
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by N8FVJ on April 18, 2003
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You own two HF radios that perform the basically the same function per the XYL. Then, can't explain to her why it is not the same as owning two cars for one driver.
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by W4ROT on April 18, 2003
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The ones that mold your life do no know,and better yet do not care.
73s
Terry
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by W4ROT on April 18, 2003
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The ones that mold your life do not know,and better yet do not care.
73s
Terry
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by W3DCG on April 18, 2003
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My bicycles got ripped off today, someone cut the cable locking them to my grill.
I left the back door wide open today.
When I discovered the cable cut and bikes missing, first thing I looked for was the 100' of coax I just bought and left on a table 3 feet from the bikes. Relief occured when I saw it still there.
All my rigs are still here.
Somehow, the violation seems okay.
For a change, my wife is the one ranting and raving, and me, chiming the lines of, "Gosh it could have been much worse; man alives, we're lucky!
1, I have my coax.
2, the grill is still there.
3, all my radios are still here.
In reality, the importance goes Radios, Grill, Coax. I have a strange mind.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by KE2IV on April 19, 2003
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Per #10:
But the junk box will ALWAYS have the first component giving you false hope of a successful project!
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by KE2IV on April 19, 2003
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W3DCG,
I think you're wife was expressing a more PERSONAL concern that you may have intitially realized, OM.
Like...er...you're house was VIOLATED!
Think about it. And then extract yourself from the dog house that otherwise will become your home and ham shack - all in one!!!
73,
George
KE2IV
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by AG4DG on April 19, 2003
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If your antenna has never been hit by lightning, it's not high enough.
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by W3DCG on April 20, 2003
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KE2IV,
Yeah...need to apply the Men/Mars Women/Venus principles.
I guess I painted an inaccurate picture, the back door must be accessed via walking by the neighbors really loud scary dogs, on the opposite side of the carport. The carport is not a garage, and that's where the bikes were locked.
The house was not entered. If it had been IR sensors would have tripped, and the two other doors were dead-bolted, no way out from inside without key.
Thank God for dogs.
Ever wonder about dog spelled wackbards?
Nevertheless I will miss my bicycle, not half as much as I'd have missed my radio tho! I'll live without it, but without my radio?
73!
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by KB1IVU on April 20, 2003
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After buying another rig saying to the wife "this is it, I'll never need another radio!"
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WB8ETHJR on April 21, 2003
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Higher the the twoer / more TVI complaints..
I'll bet. I'm an and SWL and when I put up a big antenna, I start to hear complaints !
Adam
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by KD1S on April 21, 2003
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If you smell something burning, don't assume it's "Just dust".
That was the case one night as my friend Mike, KH6HZ and I were working on 10M AM. His FT-1000D smoked a capacitor. Next time I'm hoping that when he smells something burning he'll not assume it's just dust.
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by KE4MOB on April 23, 2003
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Before the cut: 1.1 SWR below the lower edge of the band.
After the cut: 1.1 SWR above the upper edge of the band.
That happened last night!
Steve, KE4MOB
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by VE2JL on April 23, 2003
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For years you have been looking for that special widget and you finally stumble across one at a hamfest. You commit and buy it with a promise from the vendor to mail you the manual first thing next week!
What year will next week be in?
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WA2JJH on April 24, 2003
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OK. You have just finished the mother of all homebrew
projects. One of three things will happen when you are firing it up.
1)It will not work
2)Before applying Vcc, the phone rings. It will be a naggy relitive or telemarketer.
3)Combustion
73 and laugh's MIKE
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by KC0PAN on April 24, 2003
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>>
9)When we were young little hamlets, we got lip from an old timer!
<<
There are a couple of old timers around here who like to ragchew on calling frequencies. While I'm not young and I'm certainly not little, I am a new General and so I am a little shy about giving them a little lip of my own.
But everytime my scanner stops on those inconsiderate geezers, I *REALLY* want to. :o/
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by N1KGH on April 26, 2003
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If you build a "temporary" antenna, you will end up using it 2 years longer than it took you to design its "better replacement".
Moral: Make your "temporary" antennas last!
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WD8IOL on April 27, 2003
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The R.F. transistors always blow out to protect the 39-cent fuse.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WS1H on April 27, 2003
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A senior moment truth...
A call sign is more easily remembered than the name that goes with it.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WS1H on April 27, 2003
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A senior moment truth...
A call sign is more easily remembered than the name that goes with it.
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by KE5GK on April 27, 2003
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As my article moves off the "Hit Parade", I thank all hams for their witty comments and observations. Maybe an eleventh undeniable truth could be
11. Hams say the darnest things.
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by W3DCG on April 27, 2003
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No matter how much time and money a ham spends "improving" and "upgrading" the station, it is never, nor will it ever, be enough.
When one finally attains the latest and the greatest, something new comes out, and we want it, and at least two thirds of the time, it doesn't work that much better than what we already had- often times it works worse. If 33 percent of what we purchase for the sake of "improvement" results in actual improvement, we're doing good.
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by AC7GO on April 28, 2003
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Smoke is what makes electronic components work: When the smoke comes out of a component, it quits working.
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RE: Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by KE5V on May 13, 2003
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All Ham radios are perfect, warrant a 5/5 rating on Eham even if only owned for 2 days, work for 20 years without needing service, and are "loved" by all Hams who own them. All have fantastic audio and can work the world on a G5RV even when flux is below 50. I've never known a Ham who regrets any equipment purchase (except me and that Kenwood 570dg, but I'm in the minority). All rigs are "the best I've ever owned", especially after less than 30 days of hard use. In the very few cases that a rig does develop problems, it's always the ground connection or the operator....
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by KO6GF on June 12, 2003
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Can someone please tell me what a "Standard" connector looks like?
Builders soon come to realize that the last component is the hardest to install. Actually, this follows a general rule which states that the last of anything is the toughest.
When will we adopt QFC for "Quiting For Chow"?
Plug Strip Conspiracy Theory #1: Once you let one of those multi-plug power strips into the house, others will follow.
Power Strip Conspiracy Theory #2: All made one plug short.
If you ever brag about a DX contact on QRP, you'll be told that, "He must have been on vacation, somewhere here local."
If your crystal bound HB rig has no RIT, you'll be asked to move down a touch. (Ever work a guy that sounded like a bass drum or Ernie in the garbage can?)
If you offer another Ham a ride to a swap meet, you better use your truck.
If field events came more often, we would not have to join a gym.
Do you want to see how fast electricity travels? Hook up your rig backwards.
72/73 de KO6GF - Denis in SF
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by WB4DX on June 22, 2003
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99% of hams who display their callsign on their vehicle license plate never have antennas on them!
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WB4DX on June 22, 2003
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You will never be completely satisfied with your radio. 6 months after you purchase it, another will come along that will strike your fancy, but it still won't be the perfect radio.
$15,000 later, I still havent't found the perfect one.
I gave up.
(including 3 generations of Icom 706's each time hoping they would fix that 2 meter receiver!)
Maybe I'll give it one more try and buy a Yaesu.
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Ten More Undeniable HamTruths
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by WA2JJH on January 11, 2004
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You are more than glad to spend $5.00 for a rancid greasy HAMFEST hotdog!
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