OK, so if NCDXF, etc. don't agree then they don't go. Then we'll see what it's really worth to the DXing community. It seems that most people take it for granted..
Actually, I would rather have it your way. I'm just saying the present model is unsustainable. (Gee, sounds like the SS/Medicare arguments.)
The problem is not whether a card should be free. The problem is that proceeds from cards are used to help pay for other expenses. The cost for a card should be purely S&H. No part of the DXpedition funding should depend on QSLs. What if propagation turns out to be terrible, or the trip is cut short? The vast majority of people will never send anything if they don't make a QSO.
The problem IS whether or not a card should be free. This thread is about increasing the required minimum donation for OQRS direct, and it ends up bordering on paying for QSL/QSO. I don't mind donating one bit but I don't think it should be required. I DO think that hams who get a new one should pony up, but not because they need to to get a confirmation.
The problem is thinking about revenue from QSLs as a source for general funds. This will not work for the very expensive activations that everyone wants. As others have stated, the cost per unique call gets too large, even assuming that they all pay. The only reasonable scheme is to have guaranteed funding set before the expedition begins, not to hope that enough comes in later to cover expenses. This means a greater reliance on early donations, sponsors and foundations. QSL cards should simply be a break-even effort.